Book Review of Nurturing the Soul of Your Family by Renee Peterson Trudeau

I applied to review Nurturing the Soul of Your Family - 10 Ways to Reconnect and Fine Peace in Everyday Life by Renee Peterson Trudeau. I was so delighted to find out I would get a free copy to review. Although I received a free copy of this book, I guarantee you it did not skew my thoughts and review of this book. With all that said, here is the review.

This book is for any parent who desires to have a better family life. If you are pregnant and looking for ways to develop your family and how to get started on the right path or have a been a parent for years but feel that what you are doing is not working, it is for you! 

Have you ever started reading a book and in the first page or two you realize, "Wow! I really need this book at this moment in my life!" That is what happened to me. As the mom of a toddler, who has become a stay at home/work at home mom and wife to a husband who travels, I long to make the time we have together meaningful. But most of the time it seems too hard to change. It's easy to stare at the television or computer to just space out and forget your troubles for a few minutes. But those few minutes often turn in to wasted hours. Now, don't get me wrong, I still like tv and my computer but I wish there was less of it in our lives. There has to be more to family time than that!

Trudeau shares stories from her family growing up, her relationship with her spouse, her son, her friends, and people she trusts, admires, and calls her teachers throughout her book. It makes the book more than a random self-help book with steps and to-do lists to improve your life. It becomes almost like a friend that you are sitting having coffee with, discussing your lives and how you want to make the most of the time you and your family are given together. Trudeau opens her heart and life to show you where she has been, what she has been through, what led her to her life now, and that we can all change and develop the family life we all long for, one baby step at a time. 

The chapters of Nurturing the Soul of Your Family include:

Chapter 1: The Transformative Power of Self-Care

Chapter 2: Peace Begins with Me: A journey to Wholeness

Chapter 3: People First, Things Second: The Digital Divide

Chapter 4: Nature: The Ultimate Antidepressant

Chapter 5: Returning to The River: Finding Spiritual Renewal

Chapter 6: Spending Time Together (Life You Mean It!)

Chapter 7: Defining, Celebrating, and Honoring Your Family Culture

Chapter 8: Do Less, Experience More

Chapter 9: Breaking Free: Making Hard Choices

Chapter 10: Building Your Support Network

Each chapter begins with a "Pause for Peace" where you take a moment and take a look inside to see what you need at that moment. Sometimes they include journaling activities, moments of thought, and other times it is taking a few deep breaths to settle yourself. She keeps it interesting in that every "Pause of Peace" is unique to that chapter and what you will be reading, thinking about, and discussing. 

During each chapter she gives you stories, ideas, reasons, and research to support what she suggests. At the end of each chapter she first encourages you to think about what is working. It gives you a chance to acknowledge those areas and things you are doing that are on the right path. Next she gives you a task (they can be as short as you want or you can stretch them out) to dive into the things discussed in the chapter, and then a journaling exercise at the end. Now don't be nervous about the journaling, they can also be as long or short as you like. And to top it off, she even gives those of you new to journaling tips on how to get started. You can still read this book without doing the journaling and other exercises discussed but you won't get the full benefits of the book. (And for that reason, I will be rereading it so I can dig in deeper.)

When I first started reading this book, I thought maybe the reason why this book spoke so much to me was because of where I currently am in my life. But the more I thought about it, so many of the people I know feel the same way I do right now and we are all at different stages in life. So I really think this book can be appropriate and useful for any family. So if you have children of any age, I highly recommend you order this book today!!

Here is a link to Renee Peterson Trudeau's website with links to buy the book at a discount!

And here is a direct link to Amazon:

Follow Renee Peterson Trudeau on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest to stay up to date on her work!

Below are the areas of the book that most personally touched me, along with a little "Thank You" to the author!

All of the chapters were wonderful and I enjoyed reading and thinking about the issues in all of them but the chapters that got me most were the first two which discussed self-care and also the chapter about "The Digital Divide." Obviously these are the areas I most need to work. The digital divide hit so close to home because I have been realizing I am very much addicted to Facebook. Not in a keep my blog site and business site updated but in a read-random-things-that-provide-no-extra-joy-or-quality-of-life kind of way. I am not saying Facebook is bad but when we put it ahead of our children or spouses it is. You have to control it like you do the way you don't eat the entire tub of ice cream. (That's also a challenge!)

The self-care chapters hit home because that is a constant battle for me. I always feel guilty when it comes to this area. I hear this little voice telling me I am selfish to need time for myself: If I take time away from my daughter, I am a bad mom. If I take time away from my husband, I am a bad wife. All of these are incorrect. I love this quote regarding self-care from the book by Renee Peterson Trudeau:

"Learning to attune and respond to your needs and desires -- practicing self-care -- impacts every aspect of your life. Nurturing yourself is not selfish -- it's essential to your survival and well-being."

The second chapter of the book is titled: Peace Begins with Me. How true is that! And if I am not taking care of myself, every single thing I touch suffers. My best friend once enlightened me of a major tendency I have and I realize not that not taking time for self-care heightens these abilities: To make mountains out of mole hills. 

Trudeau also says, "Often we have to break down in order to break through."

Little did she know that someone would be reading the book who had just had a break down. I'll get a whole post on this soon enough but last week I started therapy because I am just completely overwhelmed by life. I can't keep up with the normal "mom" things or "housewife" things much less my CPR business, childbirth educator certification, and occasionally working at the hospital. I feel like I am drowning. And go figure, once I decided to go to counseling, I immediately felt guilty because I would be spending money on me and not the family and I go alone so it's extra "selfish."

But now I get how wrong my thinking is/was! I can't be the mom, wife, friend, business owner, daughter, or sister that I know I have to capabilities to be if I don't look at what I personally need. And right now, getting to the bottom of the cause or issue that is making me feel out-of-control-overwhelmed is the very best thing I can do for everyone around me.

So Renee, thank you for your book. It has offered me words of encouragement in a dark hour and time in my life. At a time that I know I have everything to be happy about yet I am barely keeping my head out of the water. You book has challenged me in wonderful ways and helped me see that taking care of myself is not selfish or wrong, it is a must! My one word theme of the year is "Now" and your book fit perfectly because I need this now, not tomorrow or next year, but now! Self-care is needed now and every day for everyone!

I highly recommend this book to all the moms in my life!! 

Q & A Introduction to Renee Trudeau, Author of Nurturing the Soul of Your Family

I just finished reading Nurturing the Soul of Your Family - 10 Ways to Reconnect and Fine Peace in Everyday Life by Renee Peterson Trudeau. I received a free copy to review and I fell in love with this book and it's message, I would have happily bought it! I wanted to make sure I really read the book in order to give you a good glimpse of it and that wasn't hard at all! I will be writing my review later tonight but I wanted to introduce you to the author, Renee Trudeau. This book really moved me and it came at an incredibly perfect time in my life. I'll share more later in my review. For now, enjoy this Q & A and get to know the incredible woman behind the book!

An Interview with Renee Peterson Trudeau

Author of Nurturing the Soul of Your Family

Many of your book’s supporters — Harville Hendrix, Jennifer Louden, Vicki Abeles — talk about the timeliness of this book, which you stress in the introduction. Why is this? 

Nurturing the Soul of Your Family was born from a movement I started in 2009 — inspired by my late father--called Live Inside Out. Live Inside Out challenges people to slow down and live more intentionally. More than ever, thousands of us are hitting the pause button and reflecting on what’s really important in life.  Due in large part to the economic recession, our worst since the Great Depression, we’re realizing our external environment can change on a dime: job gone, house gone, investments tanked. And when what we “thought” makes us happy, vanishes—where does that leave us?  

Men and women — particularly parents — are doing more soul searching than we have in the past. We’re ready for a new way of being. We want our lives, careers and relationships to have more meaning, to be more personally fulfilling. We want to feel more connected — to ourselves, to those we love and to humanity. We want to align our actions with our core values. And, we’re desperately looking for teachings and tools to help us find this balance. Not in a “this would be nice” kind of way, but in an “I’m sick and tired” of feeling bad and having my sense of happiness come from “out there.”  Our outer world is a reflection of our inner world and Nurturing the Soul of Your Family helps readers pause, slow down, learn to nurture their inner life and live more intentionally so they’re driven by their internal values—as opposed to external or societal values. (Renee offers weekly insights on how to Live Inside Out on her global Live Inside Out Facebook community.)

You have worked with thousands of women at all life stages from around the globe for almost 14 years through your Personal Renewal Group program and workshops. What do they share are the biggest challenges they face? 

Many women (and men) share they feel overscheduled, overworked, like they’re always rushing and life has become a giant to-do list. Overuse and misuse of technology is making them feel disconnected and it’s hard to unplug and just “be.” Due to an extreme lack of self-care — they’re parenting from an “empty cup,” feeling exhausted, and are concerned that they’re losing the ability to find joy in daily family life. 

You seem very passionate about the topic of emotional well-being for families. What inspired the work you now do?   

My mom suffered from clinical depression and I grew up navigating a lot of chaos and uncertainty (part of this was due to coming from a family of nine). I never knew what to expect day-to-day and feelings of peace and harmony seemed fleeting and far between. My emotional well-being was entirely dependent on what was going on around me. I was never taught that it’s possible to experience inner peace even in the midst of disequilibrium. Nurturing the Soul of Your Family teaches parents an invaluable skill: to anchor within themselves and that they can experience happiness, harmony and well-being, even in the midst of mayhem.

Why are the rates of depression, antidepressant use and stress (in adults and children) at an all-time high? 

Most of us have bought into the mindset (whether we know it or not) that we’re self-improvement projects. These feelings of unworthiness, combined with unrealistic expectations about how “life” should be, can cause tremendous stress and anxiety in parents and in kids. We’re messy, raw, unpredictable, beautiful human beings who are constantly growing, stretching, expanding and evolving. Conscious parenting and family work can be some of the hardest there is.  Also, our culture’s over-emphasis on the “outer world,” while paying very little attention to our “inner world,” can be devastating. Dis-ease and depression often manifest when we’re no longer connected to our true selves. We need to work together to create a culture that advocates for the care and feeding of our hearts and souls, which is equally as important as caring for our bodies. 

Your book outlines ten paths to peace to help readers reconnect and experience more peace on a daily basis. What are they?

• Tapping the transformative power of self-care: attune and respond to your needs and desires
• Healing from the inside out: peace begins with me
• Unplugging to plug in: remember, people first, things second
• Unleashing the healing power of nature: the ultimate antidepressant
• Making time for spiritual renewal: return to the river within
• Loving the ones you’re with: spend time together (like you mean it!)
• Defining, celebrating, and honoring your family culture: what do you stand for?
• Slowing down: do less to experience more
• Exploring a new way of being: make hard choices, break free, and do it different
• Building your tribe: ask for and embrace help as you create your support network

If families were to just embrace three or four insights or strategies from Nurturing the Soul of Your Family that would make a big impact on their daily lives, what would they be? 

1. Be open to a new way of being: Be bold, do it different. Be willing to take the road less traveled. Open up to the possibility that there is another way of seeing and experiencing life and begin to imagine what that would look like for your family. 2. Be compassionate and loving with yourself: treat yourself as worthy of the same self-nurturing, acceptance, and tenderness that are afforded your children. 3. Invite in playfulness and curiosity as you begin your journey; 

awareness is the first step towards positive change. 4. Get support — smart people do. It makes everything easier. 

People’s desire for spiritual renewal seems to be growing. What have you observed about this as you travel and teach? 

I definitely think we’re experiencing a hunger for more sacredness, meaning and connection to something bigger than ourselves in our daily lives. I am passionate about teaching “everyday spirituality”—meaning how we connect to the Divine (whatever that means to you) in the midst of carpooling, homework and meetings. Ways of connecting to the Divine might be service to others, music, meditation or prayer, or for a huge number of us — nature. I think feeling a connection to the Divine as we work, parent and relate to one another, can have an enormous impact on our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being. Spiritual renewal is as essential as eating or exercise — it gives our life purpose, fulfillment and helps us feel more connected to others and to our own true nature.

It seems your career took a radical turn when you moved from being a corporate communications director to the work you do today—teaching, speaking, writing and coaching on life balance. What inspired this shift? 

There were three “life defining” experiences. First, the loss of three family members from 1992-2000 really woke me up to the awareness that life is short and “the time is NOW!” Second, I had a life-changing experience in 1996 at Dachau — the German concentration camp — that really challenged me to reclaim my life, stop blaming others for what I didn’t like about my circumstances, and move into the driver’s seat (I write about this in Chapter 9). Last but not least, having my son Jonah in 2002, had a profound impact on me on every level and was the inspiration for the creation of the now global Personal Renewal Group program for women and my first book, The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal.  

Having coached thousands of men and women around coming into greater alignment with how they desire to live and work, what is needed for change to occur?  

Three things: Clarity and a vision for what they want (what does the life/career you desire look and feel like?), lots of self-compassion (making a life or career change is courageous work!) and taking deeply guided baby steps while getting lots of support (often we try to run before we’ve learned to crawl). Support could be from a friend, mentor, coach, a therapist, a minister or someone else.  Learning to ask for and receive help can take years of practice; it’s like strengthening a muscle. 

What’s the most important thing we should be teaching our kids right now around self-care and emotional health?  

As parents we spend a lot of time and energy around our kids’ cognitive and physical development, but we rarely focus on their emotional or spiritual health.  Conveying to our kids-through our actions that they not only deserve and have permission to nurture their hearts and souls, but that it’s their birthright to do so — could be one of the most important lessons we ever share. 

You’ve got a lot going on — two businesses, a new book, travel, a family—what do you do in your day-to-day life to stay grounded and at peace? 

I practice moment-to-moment self-care. This means I do my best to attune and respond to what I most need in the moment. Sometimes this is stopping work in the middle of the day for a 10-minute meditation, going to yoga or dance when it looks like I don’t have time to do this, having tea with a spiritual mentor, hiking out in nature, giving myself permission to say “no” to a new work project or social invitation or practicing “good is good enough.” I’m highly motivated to “feel good,” so I try and make choices that truly support the emotional well-being of myself and my family moment to moment.  

What is your greatest hope for families?  

My greatest hope is that this book will inspire parents to open to new ways of being. That it will help them find their center and move through chaos and uncertainty with renewed strength and ease; live in greater alignment with their values and what matters most; slow down, live more intentionally and know what's best for themselves and their family; and release old fears and learn to live more in the present moment . And most importantly, that it will help them see that their family members can be their greatest source of joy!

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR 

Renée Peterson Trudeau is the author of the new book Nurturing the Soul of Your Family. A sought after life balance coach/speaker and president of Career Strategists, her work has appeared in The New York Times, Good Housekeeping and numerous media outlets. On the faculty of Kripalu Center for Yoga & Wellness, she leads life balance workshops and retreats for Fortune 500 companies and organizations worldwide. Thousands of women in ten countries are participating in Personal Renewal Groups based on her first book, The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal. She lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and son. http://www.reneetrudeau.com. 

NURTURING THE SOUL OF THE FAMILY by Renée Peterson Trudeau

March 1, 2013 •  Parenting/Personal Growth •  240 pages • Trade Paperback

Price: $15.95 • ISBN 978-1-60868-158-7